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The Zoo 1: Unborn
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The Zoo 1 - Unborn.adf
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Soaps.txt
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1992-10-23
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3KB
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63 lines
@H@3WHATS HAPPENING IN BRITAIN'S SOAPS
@A@2By Uncle Jack
@FHbigwall16
@FApearl08
@FMdarkparticle08
2
{2@1
1Here is whats happening in the soaps soon. Spread the word on your beloved
1programmes, my people.
1
1[Please note that when Uncle Jack wrote this article you could still buy
1Mars Bars for 12p, so therefore some of the characters mentioned might be
1dead or something - Jude]
1
{1@5EASTENDERS
{5@1
{1- Auntie Nelly gets @7raped@1 by Jools in Arthur's shed.
{1- Bianca gets involved in a @7cult@1, which meets in the Vic on week nights.
{1- Nigel @7videos@1 him and Debs (figure out what their doing for yourself) and
1 gets it mixed up in his shop. He hires it out to a familar character.
{1- Mark is depressed and takes his own life in the Vics @7toilets.@1
{1- Pauline Fowler has @7silicone@1 implants.
1
{1@5BROOKSIDE
{5@1
{1- Mick locks Ben (a new character) in the @7cupboard@1 of the Pizza Parlour.
{1- Jimmy gets @7blinded@1 by Mike's new lawn mower and vows revenge.
{1- Barry sees the spirit of Simon and pleads with the @7lord@1 for forgiveness.
{1- Jean invites @7Clive@1 Anderson to a comedy improvisation night.
{1- Ron gets locked in his store room, @7naked@1 by Bing and is found by Ben.
{1- Bing gets the @7droops@1 again and Audrie puts things right.
{1- Sinbad reveals, to his family that he had a @7sex@1 change when he was fifteen,
1 and that his real name is Valerie.
1- Auntie Brena discovers Sinbad's deadly secret and blackmails him. He must
{1 become her sex @7slave@1, sneaking in to the exstention each night. If he fails
1 in his task she threatens to reveal him to his customers, putting his
1 steady window cleaning business at risk.
{1- Ron becomes a @7mad@1 monk in the hope he will join DD.
{1- Carl Banks goes into a @7drug@1 rehabilitation centre where he meets Michael
1 Barrymoore and gets a spot on Mike's new show `Kick the habit'.
1- Max becomes obssessed with Dusty Springfield and jets off around the world
1 to find her. He gets depressed and says he must kill her to get rid of his
{1 @7obssession@1.
1- Bing sets up his own political party so he can become Prime Minister and
{1 run the country as a @7police state@1.
1
{1@5CORONATION STREET
{5@1
{1- Ken, Don Brennan and Des Barnes @7rob@1 Better Buys in an armed shoot out.
{1- Steve MacDonald has a @7sex@1 change to escape a nutter.
{1- Curly gets @7cancer.@1
{1- Bet @7shaves@1 her head in protest of a new motorway through the Rovers.
{1- People think Emily Bishop has opened up a @7brothel.@1
1- Jack Duckworth has a lucky streak, winning the national lottery, the pools
{1 and spot the @7ball@1 in 5 days, but loses all the money in a tragic fire in
1 his house, which also kills Vera.
1
1Some of these events seem unbelivable, but we they are true. Tune in next
1time, when amoung other stories we tell you the truth about Pennie Crosbies
{1skisaphrenia and reveal all about Mick Johnsons @1BMP@1 connections.
1Can you wait ?
X0*]